There Is A Spaniard In My Mother's Bathroom

There is a Spaniard in my mother's bathroom. His face regally gazes out at me from under a wide-brimmed hat in a lower corner of the wall by the door, where the tile has broken off and left the sea green plaster exposed underneath. His chiseled features are formed by marbled wisps of white; the remains of some adhesive that wasn't ready to let go.

His face has always been there, but no one has ever mentioned it. I don't know if anyone else has looked at that broken tile and seen anything more than just that. I will not speak of him. He is my personal portrait and as I sit on the toilet and stare at his face, I wonder; if I broke away all of the white and green tiles that line these walls, what magnificent portrait of some foreign, royal land would be uncovered.

60%

Let me tell you something about flat seltzer: It has more emotion than your normal water. The tap water, it’s got stuff in it, sure, and the bottled water, it’s pristine and all of that. But that flat seltzer is so much more. It’s naked and vulnerable. When all the bubbles are gone, no one wants it. It feels abandoned and useless, like a singer whose voice has been lost. It’s felt joy and it’s experienced loss. It’s brimming with insecurity as it sits in the fridge waiting for someone to unscrew its cap and hear that painful silence where a fizzing used to be.

Don’t pour it out! Devour its flatness, feast upon its shortcomings, absorb its essence! You see, everyone forgets that seltzer is still water underneath all the razzle dazzle.

My water needs character; it needs emotion! I’m 60% water— that’s more than half of me! How can you have 60% of you be soulless?

That’s just no way to live.

Rold Gold White Dipped Honey Braided Twists

I have decided to take a moment to make an important public service announcement.

For a while now, I have declared Rold Gold Honey Wheat Braided Twists to be my favorite pretzel of all time. I did not think that any pretzel could ever out-do my love for these delightfully salty twists with just a hint of sweetness, but Rold Gold, you've done it again!

I was browsing through the Hampstore (Hampshire College store) a couple days ago, when my eyes were drawn to a small tan bag. I stared at it for a minute, not quite believing what I had seen, but alas it was true!

It was a bag of Rold Gold White Dipped Honey Braided Twists. That's right, the most delectable pretzel has been dipped in white chocolate and my god, it is amazing.

I've just finished the bag and I will probably be back to buy another one later today because they really raise the bar for pretzels everywhere (Utz, get at me!).

So I just wanted to let the world know that a superior pretzel has been born. I'm not saying that you should go out and buy a bag right now, but basically that is exactly what I'm saying.

*I couldn't find a picture of the white dipped ones, so just imagine those dipped in white chocolate...

Italics

I haven't blogged in a while, and I can't think of anything that pressing to blog about, or anything that interesting to randomly blog about. But lately I have noticed that italics make anything look more important. This applies mainly to full sentences, not just particular words. To understand the full effect of the power of italics, I will provide a few examples:

Like this sentence.

Look at the difference between:

The iguana prefers a down jacket.

and

The iguana prefers a down jacket.

Encapsulated (a poem)

Walking through the park,

Still hours until the world grows dark,

With every step movement is sparked,

On the sidewalk pebbles leave their mark,

And in my mind there's an arc of light.

There is magic all around me,

This force that grounds me,

These lives that surround me,

This world that astounds me,

And the people all around me are oblivious.

I'm staring,

Spacing,

My mind is whirling,

Twirling,

And it's as if the universe has been unraveled.

Horrible things all around,

Crying and screaming horrible sounds,

People in rags glued to the ground,

Children picked up from the lost and found,

And I can't close my glazed eyes.

I'm seeing missed chances,

Meant to be romances,

Souls sharing dances,

Exchanging innocent glances,

Laced with "what if"s.

The static is moving to its own beat,

The ground is dancing beneath my feet,

The world is paving me a new street,

Made of glitter and concrete,

And all of a sudden, everything is okay.

People Cakes (a poem/rap thing)

Someone once asked me what I believed in.

I said I was agnostic.

They asked me if that was a religion.

I said no.

They asked me for a definition.

I said,

there could be such a thing as fate,

prayers could be shipped at first rate,

to someone very great...

Or not.

To me it doesn't really matter,

because in the end all we are could just be matter,

some sort of genetic batter,

baked into people cakes.

Some Stuff About Bubbles (Part 2)

"A bubble is this simple, very fragile, easy to understand, beautiful, dreamlike thing that I believe represents this... this future love." -- Lady Gaga